Save Your Breath
3 Reflections
Wisdom knows when correction will do no good. That’s an uncomfortable sentence if you believe every error or untruth must be confronted. But Solomon knows better: “He who corrects a scoffer gets shame for himself, and he who rebukes a wicked man only harms himself” (Proverbs 9:7). A scoffer is someone who is prideful and doesn’t listen to advice. Correct a scoffer and you’ll be the one who feels like you did something wrong. “Do not correct a scoffer, lest he hate you; rebuke a wise man, and he will love you” (Proverbs 9:8). Same rebuke. Same words. But one hates you for it, and the other loves you for it. The variable was never your delivery. It’s the heart on the receiving end. Before wisdom speaks, wisdom assesses the heart it’s speaking to.
You can’t argue a closed heart open. Why is the scoffer uncorrectable? “A fool has no delight in understanding, but in expressing his own heart” (Proverbs 18:2). The fool isn’t in the conversation to learn; he’s in it to express his feelings. “A scoffer does not love one who corrects him, nor will he go to the wise” (Proverbs 15:12). So “do not speak in the hearing of a fool, for he will despise the wisdom of your words” (Proverbs 23:9). Most of us still believe that the right argument, worded carefully enough, repeated one more time, can do what only God can do. So we keep spending ourselves on conversations that were never going anywhere, and we walk away wounded, wondering what we said wrong. You didn’t say it wrong. Correction can water soft ground, but it can’t break up hard ground. Only God can do that. None of this is contempt for the person. It’s stewardship of your words. Your words are seed, and seed is too valuable to scatter on pavement.
Jesus knew when to say nothing. “Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine” (Matthew 7:6). And He practiced it. When Jesus stood before Herod, Herod was delighted — he had wanted to see Him for a long time, hoping to watch a miracle. Herod “questioned Him with many words, but He answered him nothing” (Luke 23:9). The Word made flesh stood in front of a fool and said nothing at all. He had plenty to say. But Herod wasn’t asking in order to hear. Maybe you’re worn out from your own version of that conversation — with a family member, a coworker, someone online — where every word you offer gets collected as material and handed back as mockery. It’s okay to stop. Ending the conversation isn’t failure. Pray for the scoffer — God can plow ground you can’t.
“Sometimes silence is all that men deserve, and the only thing which in any probability will impress them.” - Charles Spurgeon
2 Scriptures
“To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven… a time to keep silence, and a time to speak.”
— Ecclesiastes 3:1, 7
“And a servant of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all, able to teach, patient, in humility correcting those who are in opposition, if God perhaps will grant them repentance, so that they may know the truth.”
— 2 Timothy 2:24, 25
1 Action
Ask yourself:
who is the one person I keep trying to correct — the argument I’ve rehearsed in the car, the message I’ve drafted and deleted, the point I’m sure will finally land this time?
Is this person actually able to hear you right now — or are you trying to do work that only God can do?
If it’s the second one, take the correction you’ve been rehearsing and turn it into a prayer. Say their name to God today instead of making your point to them. He can reach places your arguments can’t.
Grace and peace,
NEIL
